For the Sake

 Oh, so many emotions.

Today I swallowed them all for the sake of being empathetic. 

Here, in my space, I will let them be.

I am so anxious.

Nothing will tear apart your insides like the anxiety of waiting on one of the biggest "Yes or No" questions of your life. It's changing how much I sleep, making me feel physically sick, shortening my breath, and taking over my mind.

I am scared of being a failure. I am scared that I put months of work into words that were written to be judged by someone that I've never even met. I am scared that my words hold no worth.

I am hopeful that my words have worth and touch the heart of someone else so much that they would like to meet me. I want to leave a positive impact on others when I write. This is why I tell stories when talking about my personal qualities. Stories mean more to humans than gloating about accomplishments.

I am sad for a friend that had a particularly difficult day. I wish that I could take away even an ounce of their hurt.

I am excited about the possibility of a new someone.

I am ready for what comes next, but I still find myself taking the proper time to mourn who I was while simultaneously allowing the butterflies in my stomach to fly.

I have so many emotions and they all stopped for a moment and I got to breathe when I got a hug.

It was nice,

to be held for a moment.

-Emma Lancaster