The Night Before

 The night before I left, I found myself in an overwhelmed state of mind.

I sat on that darn floor. I looked at the suitcase on my bed. I looked at the clothes on my floor. I looked at the college supplies, also on the floor. I looked at the rubbermaid tote sitting next to me on the floor, meant to hold said college supplies.

Less than 30 seconds later, I was the one in the rubbermaid tote. Not my college supplies. 

It really is hilarious, looking back. 

I believe I called that moment a "level seven freak out."

I was so stressed out about packing and getting ready for the trip that I forgot to be excited about the trip itself. 

I sat in that rubbermaid tote for a good and solid thirty minutes before I finally got out, packed my suitcase, and zipped it shut. I went to bed after that.

When I woke up the next morning, I remembered how to be excited. I finished packing everything quickly and was ready to leave four hours early.

I took a deep breath as the car pulled out of the driveway and felt an immense weight lift. I was finally leaving the place where I had spent the last month in a dream-like state, constantly having to remind myself that it was real and it hurt and it happened.

That weight lifted. It left me.

I began to truly live again.

-Emma Lancaster